31st March, 2009 - This morning, I finally submitted my first ever entry for the MPH-Alliance Bank National Short Story competition. Results will be announced in early June 2009. Hey, guys and gals, do pray that I win okay? Ha ha ... keeping my fingers crossed here ! Anyway, it was with great satisfaction that I did what I promised myself to do a few months back, so, that in itself is already a great self-accomplishment ^_^ After all, writing has always been my passion, more so these days ....
A preface : I wrote the following and dedicated to my mom during last Mother's Day and Bea, my loving sister, helped me to translate it into Chinese as my mom do not read English. I still remember the great pleasure I derived from the mere thought of how this will be mom's best Mother's Day gift, ever, from the bottom of my heart .... hey, I also made my mom shed tears of happiness leh ^_^
For the competition, I added some new chapters into this story. So, here's for your reading pleasure :
A LOVE LETTER TO MAMA
Dear Mama,
Today, while taking my shower after my morning swim, I was reflecting on my journey with you, a journey of 39 years. I really took a very long shower, walking down memory lane as best I could remember you, mama. Today, I have decided to write you a love letter.
You told me I was born in an era where social turbulence was in the air. You told me you had to be admitted into the hospital a few weeks before I was due to be born in late June 1969. You related how it was that you had to lie down in bed at night at the hospital, waiting in anticipation and in fear. Alas, I was born abridged, my feet came out first and somehow I managed to squeeze out of your womb a healthy bouncy baby girl, wailing loud and clear! Thank you, mama, for bringing me into this world despite the odds.
You were and still are our big big umbrella, an umbrella so big that you had all of us, all the six of us under your protection, even when we are grown ups now. You still care so much. I really admire your energy, mama, after all these years. Today, I want to hold your hand and walk down memory lane with me.
Those days in the village, before we moved to KL, were carefree days for me, I remember well. I would roam about the village and get myself dirty all over, playing with sand and mud, roughing it out with the village boys, getting into fights and all the tomboy stuff. You would scold me so hard but you also cleaned me up, powdered me and changed me into clean clothing. Thank you mama, for the love and understanding you showed me.
When we were young, you made sure we girls know how to behave like girls. No swearing, no sitting on table tops, no sharing of pants with the boys. We had to share our duty rosters. The way I remember us as kids, we girls took turns hand-washing our clothes. From brushing vigorously at all the sweat-stained places like the collars, sleeves and not to mention the fishy smell of dad's working shirts ... to wriggling the heavily wet clothing in an effort to drain the water off from one bucket of water to the next, all in the one toilet we shared ! ... to hanging the washed clothes onto hand-made wire-hangers ... to bringing the clothes in when dry... to applying a mist of water over those clothes before ironing them the next day just so that the fabric has become soft enough to be pressed on ... those were the dreaded days !! Oh yes, our wardrobe was made up of a wooden box from the fish wet market where dad worked, your ingenuity no doubt ... We were financially poor back then. Life was quite a struggle but mama, you made life simple, for which I am eternally grateful.
Mama, you also taught me how to wash the dishes, sweep and mop the floor, boil water, clean vegetables, fry eggs and many other stuff that girls were supposed to learn. Till today, my best recipes for fried banana with your well-kept secret ingredient, that’s a pinch of Eno, is still much sought after. Not to mention, the beloved fried shrimps in sweet and sour sauce ... hmm ... yummy! Of course, how could I resist your best curry chicken in the whole of KL, again with your secret ingredient, rock sugar huh? As I am writing this, could you believe it, I am salivating!
Of all the house chores, I particularly liked to sweep and mop the floor. I became quite good at it, learned how to hold the broom and dust-pan in a manner which is relaxing and yet efficient in collecting all the dust, hair and all. Those days, we had to mop the floor on our knees, using a piece of cloth. That was the most effective way to clean the cement floor we had back in the little 3 room flat. 1 master bedroom for mom and dad, 1 office cum bedroom for dad's workers and 1 bedroom for all of us 6 siblings with a double-decker for the boys and I had to sleep in the collapsible lazy chair. Every night, I was responsible for lighting the mosquitoe coil in an effort to keep our bedroom free from mosquitoes. Putting the mosquitoe coil into the milo tin day in day out, it became a habit. Thank you mama, for teaching me how to keep mosquitoes away!
When papa said, girls do not need a high education, you taught me the A, B, Cs and 1, 2, 3s. You would praise me for being a good copier. I knew you were so proud of me. I was able to write Chinese characters, even the difficult ones. During the numerous drives we had together when papa bought his car, you would ask me to add up the numbers displayed on the various number plates all cars have. That was how I discovered mathematics in an interesting way. Thank you mama, for being the best teacher you knew how. Nowadays, when we do go out to shop at the hypermarkets, you still amaze me with your genius mathematical mind, whereas I still had to dig out my calculator, every time! Ha ha ... that’s what modern technology and gadgets do to lazy minds like mine, even though, as a Chartered Accountant, I should be right at home with figures huh?
When you and papa moved to KL where papa started his wholesale fish business at the market now known as Central Market, you brought me along, leaving behind my three elder sisters. I am so blessed. Even though you were a stranger in KL back then, you braved yourself and got me to follow a friend you met to a non-Chinese school. I was terrified, for I do not understand a word the teachers and classmates were talking. Cantonese and English were so foreign to me. Somehow I learnt. Still remember those days in kindergarten when you would walk with me to and from kindergarten. When I asked you "Mama, today teacher said I am good. What does that mean?" and you just gave me a smile and explained to me, it means "serves you right"! I actually believed you!
I still remember your strict ways with us when I was a little girl. I was terrified every time you raise your voice, I would open my ears big big for your footsteps, the jingles you made when you walk, the anklet you had on your feet, kind of gave you away. I remember the numerous times I wet the bed, not on purpose though, I just had a tough time controlling my bladder. I am so sorry I made you change the bed sheet every time I did that. Well, luckily the bed then had a plastic cover, I guess it must be the genius in you. When Dash, my very own kid, yup, that’ right, he is already 10 years old, wets the bed, I would be furious. Recalling those shameful days when I did the same, a smile could be seen on my face and I would forget about getting angry with Dash, with having to change the bed sheets. You know what, I copied your style! That piece of plastic still saved the day! Thank you, mama, for teaching me simple solutions to our everyday challenges.
The many nights I slept in your bed, clinging to you, listening to the midnight ghost stories from the redifussion, frightened and yet enjoying the thrills of the eerie sounds. The days when all of us would rush to stand very near to the redifussion every time there is a special series on air, be it of love, of mysteries, of jokes... that was something I would remember for life!
Though we were poor back then, you always give us the best. You saved the occasional chicken drumsticks, for us, never for yourself. You made us hot pancakes for breakfast. I really miss your hot pancakes, mama. I was a sickly child, always coughing, I made you worried, you had to drag me to the doctors and when nothing seem to work, you relentlessly fed me with cod liver oil. I used to hate it so much. The smell was terrible, it stinks so much, I vomited lots of time. You cleaned me up. I know I must have been a nuisance. Today, Bob, your grandson, my youngest child would occasionally vomit after a heavy meal. I am glad that I have learned to be patient, from none other than you, mama. For that I thank you.
You would walk the miles to the wet market to buy vegetables, even when it's a heavy load, you would walk the miles back, not caring if your muscles ache and that your shoulders would slant to one side because you wanted to save on the bus fare. You would go the extra miles to save. You made papa give us monthly school allowances instead of daily pocket money. That really helped me plan my spending and get into the habit of saving money. Thank you, mama, for teaching us to save for the rainy days. Until today, you are still collecting rain water whenever it rains, just so that we can recycle the rain water. You have taught me a great lesson, mama.
During my primary school days, I remember loathing to bring my tumbler to school. You gave me my baby milk bottle instead of the fancy ones all my classmates were having! I really hated it so much and had to hide just to take a sip of water from that baby milk bottle! One day, when my classmate discovered that I drank from a baby milk bottle, I was brutally laughed at, I wished I could dig a hole underground and hid there forever! Now, I could laugh at myself thinking of those embarrassing moments! Thank you mama, for teaching me the value of making the best out of the little comfort we had ...
When times were better, when papa could afford all the great comforts in life, when papa bought our big new house, when papa got all his children a brand new car each, you never forget your roots. You still saved. You were and still are the family's saviour. The numerous times when papa's business got into financial crisis, you dug into your savings, your hard to come by savings! I salute you, mama.... for being the generous you.
Those selfless acts ... you taught me the real meaning of siblinghood. I still remember those days when your sisters gave birth to their little babies. You were there for them. You became more than their confinement lady. You cooked special confinement food for your sisters. You bathed their little darlings. You love your sisters unconditionally. You became their real big sister, a mother to them even. You are their beloved big sister. I can see that. I can understand why you are so much respected by them, every one of your brothers and sisters. I am so very proud of you, mama.
When I was a teenager, I must have worried you so much. I still remember the day when you throw a birthday party for me at our new home back then when I turned sweet 16. First came the disco lights, then all sorts of guys turned up, some in their rowdy motor bikes! You pulled me to a side and said "I thought all your friends are girls. I thought I sent you to an all-girls' school, a Convent! Where the hell did you get to know so many boys?" Ha ha ... those were my wild days, mama. Thank you so much for trusting me and for the freedom you gave me. Your beloved little daughter turned out alright, didn't I?
The day when I announced that I have been accepted into Universiti Sains Malaysia, you asked me, where is that? When I told you it’s in Penang, you went “Oh, that’s so far away!” Immediately I knew, you would miss me, for which I am glad, really. I knew right there and then that you want to have all your beloved kids near you and papa, just so that you could keep an eye on us, just to make sure we are protected and well cared for. So, when I announced that I have also been accepted into TAR College, you smiled. I could still remember clearly what a big smile you had at that moment. I could not have chosen a better course in Financial Management, and graduated with a much sought-after qualification, ACCA. Now, I could proudly call myself a Fellow of the Chartered Association of Certified Accountants. Thank you, mama, for helping me chose my studies and career.
When I was in college and started serious dating, you were so worried about the kind of guy I was dating that you actually got me to bring him home to be my brother's room-mate ! Thank you, mama, for giving me and the family the opportunity to see the real him, for giving me the freedom of choice to marry my first lover. You must be so hurt the day I announced my intention to divorce and I knew you felt really angry at my ex but I want you to know that I am happier now than ever. Thank you mama, for bringing me up as an independent woman, for respecting and blessing the choices I made in life.
When I was down with dengue in the hospital, you were dead worried when I had to be admitted into Tawakal Hospital's ICU. You prayed and prayed. When the sinseh told you that I only have a 50:50 chance, you must have felt devastated. That day, I mentioned to you, I will not give up so easily, I am a fighter, I still had a lot more to look forward to in life, I want to get married and bear children... you smiled amidst your tears. Those moments made me realise the love of a great mommy for her sick child... Thank you, mama, for taking good care of me.
That one year I stayed with you during my Hepatitis C treatment, you made me fresh fruit juices every morning and evening, you cooked special meals for me, you made sure I rest and relax, you made me so comfortable ... I felt so pampered and loved ! The twice a week jabs that I had to administer into my tummy, you made sure I took my panadol pills and lie down in bed comfortably after that. Just so that the hot and chilly spells are more bearable for me. I could rest well because you made sure the kids do not disturb me when it’s my jabs days. The doctors were amazed at how little side effects I had during my treatments. Needless to say, it must have been your love that really pulled me through. The days when I had to work late amidst my treatment, you nagged and nagged. I knew you meant well. Thank you, mama, for reminding me to take very good care of myself. You must take very good care of yourself too, mama.
Today, reflecting on those sweet memories, I realised I am so blessed to have you as my mama. Given a choice, I would definitely choose you as my mama all over again.Thank you mama, for all the love and care you gave me. I LOVE YOU SO SO SO MUCH!!!
After a nice bath, Bombastic is now clean and well, smells good lor ^_^ Bob has been playing with Bombastic, sometimes too roughly I think but then ... boys are boys ! Well, Dash keeps Bombastic with him in his bedroom at night ! Oh God, he even cuddles him to sleep the first few nights. Looks like Bombastic is here to stay and poor mommy had to remind them every now and then to wash their hands properly with soap .... sigh :-)
The Basket Building ( Ohio , United States )
Of my many sisters, Beatrice was the best cook. She is the only one who managed to master mom's home made fish ball ! Bouncing fish balls like ping pong, very crispy and tasty. A lot of hard work preparing the fish balls, from scrapping the fish meat to mixing and battering into paste, to squeezing the meat from between the thumb and first finger and scooping the balls using spoons one by one into a bowl of clear icy water. If it floats half way, we would have great tasty bouncy fish balls after a few hours ... yummy !!!
Beatrice also took up beauty and make up skills. So, we, the other sisters were many a times made guinea pigs ! Ha ha ... love those days when we get free facials and make up from her. Learned how to apply foundation, eye shadow, eye liner, mascara, how to shadow our nose to make it look higher and how to make our lips look thinner (that was the trend back then) ... how I hated my full lips (of course, now I am thankful for my full lips ... still remember how Beatrice would tell me : sis, you know your full lips resonate a warm personality and it's very sexy leh ... ha ha ... back then everybody wanted thinner lips and I told myself : oh ya, sis, you only said that to make me feel better :-( Thanks Beatrice, now I know better ^_^
Janet, our big sister, has always been on the lookout for her younger sisters. Sometimes, it's like ... no worries, big sis is always there for us, no matter what. As long as she is able to, she will extend a helping hand. That's how great our big sis is. Thank you dear sis. You are a great example to all and I just want to extend my heartfelt gratitude for all that you have done for us. The only one with size 4 shoe, I used to wonder how you manage to walk with those pointy high heels during your working days ! Funny, isn't it that we girls all had different shoe sizes including mom's. Sigh ! If only we all had the same size, how much more fun we would have, wearing different shoes at different ocassions ! In a way, I am glad too ... ha ha ... don't have to wear hand-me-downs since I am the youngest ^_^
